January 29, 2005
I wasn’t going to blog today but something came up that caused me to cough up the following thoughts.
Gays need to be able to get married. In the present scheme of things, there can be a marked imbalance in gay relationships based on who has the money. Hell, there can be an enormous imbalance in straight relationships if there’s no marriage contract, but with the legal support of matrimony, the contribution of the lesser-earning partner can be recognized as equal to that of the moneymaker.
This is how it should be. Gays should not have to draw up contracts and jump through all sorts of legal hoops to have the same rights as straight people, and each partner needs the psychological validation that comes from society affirming he/she is an equal partner. Couples should, of course, be able to figure out how they want—or not—to mix their money, but one partner should never feel "less than" the other when it comes to household decisions, for example.
I don’t want to cite specific examples I have witnessed out of respect for the privacy of the couples involved. It is not even necessary, given the fact that we all know myriad examples that bear out a whole range of examples. I just noticed that in gay couples, even long-term committed ones, the one who earns less tends to operate with less sure-footedness in the relationship than wives (usually) who depend on the husband’s income.
And there are my two cents. (I tried to do a Tarot reading on my love prospects in the next year, and the cards evaporated in a computer error before I could read them. What the hell does that mean? Dare I try again or should I take the hint?)
MCO 2005
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