Well yesterday I got sort of down after my last entry-maybe it was because of the sentiments riled up from the writing of “Here,” maybe it was because it was classification day and my bunkie James and neighbor Magoo moved. James, I liked very much, a completely good-natured man, very young (22) who nevertheless will have exactly the same face at 55. James, who has a Chevrolet logo tattooed on his arm, didn’t “drive to live” but “lived to drive” hence over $45,000 in various tickets that got compounded and got penalties and led to missed court dates and then to DUI, and then probation and then violating probation etc etc.. Since I always dig a little deeper, James coughed up that he hadn’t finished high school because his mother died when he was in the 10th grade and he went into a spiral that eventually brought an otherwise good car-crazy California kid into here. This is the second time I have met in here a young man who “lost it” at that age after his mother’s death. What a tough blow. I bet it is the underdiagnosed cause of much lawbreaking. And at an age where there is little hope of another mother figure successfully stepping in, but close enough to adulthood that it can hardly be used as a criminal defense 6 or 7 years later.
Magoo, the other departure, was sort of a pain in the ass. However, he was a known quantity, not hostile or toxic, and grudging affection had sprouted up between us. Both left with nary a handshake—often the case in prison. These aren’t real friendships, nor should they be, after only a week. But these mini-adieus still entail a feeling of loss that reminds one of greater losses, and always bring on (particularly, when it is a Bunkie) a fear that their replacement will be an obnoxious asshole who will somehow make your life a living hell. But I have been fairly lucky with my Bunkie-karma, and as for obnoxious assholes, I have learned a thing or two. Mostly that if they are obnoxious assholes with you, they are with everybody. You are not likely the only person they are driving crazy. Most of the time, if you hold your tongue and give them a wide berth, they will usually dig their own graves and then fall into them. My Dad tried to teach me this about obnoxious assholes years ago, but I had to learn it for myself. Isn’t it funny how it takes growing older to appreciate all the things your parents told you that at the time neither of you thought you even absorbed?
MCO 2004
